ugh

alright, well this journal is basically only going to be venting...and i have alot of it to do. Alright...well happiness at the moment is no where near me right now and so im always depressed and always sad. The reason for this is that the other day on saturday, Tara broke up with me...this was one of the hardest things for me in a long long time...especially because the day after was supposed to be our 13 month anniversary. But so she has given me hope in getting back together in that if i can prove to her that i can control my anger and yelling and stuff by seeing someone then she will consider being back with me. This friday maybe i will have an appointment to see a guy to help me but other than that im just sittin around here moping around and getting plans ruined by ppl cause whenevr i make plans with someone they always seem to blow me off...but w/e. I mean thats half the reason i dont like hangin with people because its never truely when they say. Um on saturday after tara had left and after ill admit i was cryin and such i decided i needed to take my mind off of it so i wouldnt do anything stupid. SO i went to the fair which i was supposed to go to with her. I went and was supposed to meet up with mike but i saw matt first so i talked to him for awhile then went to find mike but he already left so i stayed with matt, mark and some other people. We mainly just wandered around the fair talkin to ppl and stuff and i saw a few ppl i knew but nothing special. Then we walked down towards the docks near pier 44 and a few ppl being young and dumb like they are lol went swimming on the little beach near the yacht club thing. Then after that we were walking back for the fireworks so i watched them with my friends and then met my rents at the doc and went home. I then woke up the next morning and we hadda go get my shoes and deck that i lent to my sis's idk what to call him b/f or sumthin and then we went to the hanover mall where i got my wireless bluetooth thing ot i can send pics to my comp and a bluetooth headset....so cool. So now i have some good gadjets but no money. Which sucks...but anyways now i guess i might go bikin since my plans fell through....again...well anyways i ust wanted to let you ppl kno how much my life sucks right now. sorry for wasting your time and you can leave a comment telling me anything you feel about this...well...buh bye